HOOP THERE IT IS!

HOOP THERE IT IS..NOT! WHO THE HELL R THESE WOMEN! DO ANY OF THEM HAVE A MAN...I MEAN REALLY! 4 all u sistas out there who keep complaining about ur men and say you want a baller and for the single ladies who keeps saying you want a baller...then you must not be watching BASKETBALL WIVES...CUZ THEY THE MOST INSECURE SICK PUPPIES I HAVE EVA SEEN...They may have money, but the only balling they doing, is balling their eyes out, cuz they some lonely women! SO GO HEAD GIRLS..GET URSELF A BALLER...WHILE HE BALLN EVERYBODY ELSE...personally i rather have a broke ass man delivering pizza for a living that's faithful than a rich baller that's getting pizza delivered in bed to him and his other baller wife! But you keep having expensive lunches and shopping with ur other baller wives, and buying fancy cars and crying yourself to sleep n ur lonely bed...ain't that fun and now you showing the world how much fun it is...weeee....this is so much fun...gotta get up and do it again tomorrow.

OK OK OK...I'm a little harsh...but guess what Essence.com had to say, read below:

Women are from Venus and men are dogs. Yeah yeah yeah... we know this. The differences between men and women aren't more evident as television viewing habits. The type and quality of television that men and women are as opposite as night and day. In an attempt to bridge the gender gap and understand each other a lil bit better, I've decided to indulge in the typical female television fare and keep a journal of my thoughts on the programming. My hope is that women can gain better insight into the male mind and understand why we need more than one television and don't like watching TV with you guys.

I'll be sharing thoughts as I watch the various shows.

Ok, I saw a promo for this and was immediately sucking my teeth, rolling my eyes, and waving my arms. Desperate Housewives franchise meets BET on VH1. Watching a bunch of women who got a tv show because of who they are involved with... sigh.

Let's go.

Cool. Just found out it's only 30mins. I think I'll live and make it through an episode. Keeping an oxygen tank and defibrillator close by just in case.

Opening - Wow. Most of the women are lighter than a paper bag. NBA players must all be born in Washington D.C. and below. Black people, we need to do better. Chocolate sisters need love too.

Opening Pt. II - Okay, what's with the trophy? Some double entendre going on here- the wives are trophies for their men as well as they 'won' a trophy by being attached to NBA players? Girls under the age of 21 should not be able to view this show.

First Minute - Props to Shaunie. Kept it tight after all them kids. God bless. Respect that.

Just watched a montage. I guess weaves come with the wedding ring... huh?

Opening Credits - I see Shaunie O'Neil is listed as executive producer. Talk about sword in the gut. Because she is Shaq's wife she gets a show basically dogging Shaq! Damn Gina!

Evelyn - ex-fiancé of Antoine Walker. Hol' up! She is a former almost-wife of a player? So how does she qualify for the show? Damn, not only is Toine broke, he got his ol' girl on TV seemingly living better than he is right now. Sigh...

Jennifer - wife of Eric Williams. Eric Williams is still in the league? (pause as I google to see if Eric Williams is still in the league...) Wow. Eric Williams is not in the league anymore. Hmmm... VH1 is scraping ladies from anywhere to get on here.

Erikka - ex-girlfriend of Rasual Butler. Where do I begin, the fact she is simply an ex-girlfriend or that anyone knows who the hell Rasual Butler is? (Someone insert a 'reaching' picture here).

Gloria - fiancé of Matt Barnes. Considering all the other random relationship statuses the other girls have, this is a major accomplishment here. Ain't mad at her. Did Matt Barnes get permission to go out from his wife? This relationship needs more of my attention. Might be a Doug Christie 2.0 situation. (If you don't know about Doug Christie, google him and watch in the suggested search list, his wife will be the first thing that pops up in the list. Try it!) Hold UP!!! Her sister is Shaq's sidepiece? Gloria is now the "A" plot in this show. I feel a hook sinking into the side of my mouth.

Royce - baby-mama of the player that she can not mention by name who is the starting center for the Orlando Magic. Full disclosure: I'm familiar with Royce. I saw her booty-shaking video on YouTube. I was impressed with the shaking, disappointed with the fact that it was here. Clearly the child support checks have not been coming in. Yet... Wow. They can't even run baby daddy's name in the chyron. Fellas, if you have baby mama issues, you need to talk to Dwight Howard's lawyer. STAT! I'm impressed all over again. Wow. One of the girls threw Royce down onto the subway tracks by dry-snitching that she gets around the league. This is the new "A" plot!

[Sidebar] How do women hug and kiss each other when they can't stand one another? How does this work? And why do it? [End of Sidebar]

They had Shaunie coming out the car in slow motion! Remember what Chappelle said about slow motion - makes everything look good. You can tell she is the exec producer cause none of the other girls go slo-mo. BAWSE! (in that Rick Ross voice).

Commerical Break - I gotta get some water and something to eat; this is all too much. I'm gripped by the (looking for the right word) sheer nonsense of it all. It should be illegal to watch this during the daytime like I'm doing right now.

We're Back - At the dinner table. In a nutshell, the only actual wife of the group is debating whether to continue to be the main woman as her husband juggles sidepieces as she lives 'the life,' or buck up, take a stand, end things and run the risk of losing the lifestyle. Decisions 2010.

Royce Segment - I feel bad. She has the scarlet letter J for Jump-Off branded on her forehead. Women will hate. Women will hate her especially. Hope it works out for her although I doubt it if baby daddy's lawyer has her unable to even say dude's name. (Still shaking my head in amazement over this).

The Cry Me A River Segment - Women complaining about other women calling their man. Cue the violins. I'm sorry. No sympathy. It's women disrespecting other women. The reality is that a lot of women love to take another woman's man. This is a woman thing that men don't understand. Yeah...

In Da Club - Remember when I said I felt bad for Royce... I take that back. Any girl who works a pole in a public space is an attention-(rhymes with 'more') and deserves whatever may befall them. I blame reality tv for this mentality. Oh wait...

Woman-to-Woman - Was any of Shaunie/Gloria talk sincere? Is this that faux/quasi stuff women do instead of just being honest and telling the truth on how you really feel? Someone please pull my coat.

Suzie - Ahhhh... as if we didn't have enough non-legal relationships, here comes Suzie, the ex-girlfriend of Michael Olowokandi. For those not in the know, Olowokandi might be one of the biggest (literally and figuratively) bums in NBA history. By proxy, anyone associated with dude is suspect in my book. Sorry. I'm a sports fan. Makes sense to me.

How Low Can Royce Go? - Royce can go so low (literally and figuratively) that I don't have the heart to say anything. Just watch the clip. I don't need to be Cleo the Psychic to tell that the girls will be hating and Royce will be crying. T-minus...

The Intervention - An groupie intervention at a shoe store... You can't make this stuff up. Hold up! I looked at the first three seconds and called it an intervention just to be funny only to continue watching and see that the ladies are calling it an intervention themselves!!! Clearly they've never seen A&E's TV show Intervention. Ladies, talking a crack pipe out of someone's hands is an intervention. You guys are having a chit chat. Ginormous difference. Stop the madness.

Wetworks - We've got tears. We've got tears. Took her long enough. Sheesh... Disappointed in the little we got. Expected more.

This Season... - Watching the previews of the season. Frankly, I wasn't impressed by the episode or the previews. Until... there is a scene that piqued my interests as a man. Let me leave it at that. Okay. Typing as I watch. There are two scenes. Damn! They got me. Men have certain buttons that once get pushed, there is no turning back for us. I'll give you a hint - the buttons are the title of a Boogie Down Productions album. I would go further but I'm busy rewinding.

Hmmm so some writer at Essence has a big mouth too... and yall thought LOUDMOUTHLINDA was the only one...and again..this is my opinion and my opinion only...if you don't like my opinion, then don't read my freakn blog...move the hell on...lol